A forgotten page from a diary!

Today, was the last exam of my tenth standard, the first level of crossing for an individual…this exam decides the physical state of a person…I have done it too today…this exam results will unfold my future and I will know what I am to become or pursue to live the life I breath in.

I have done my exams well and hope to fair well in my life too, but never know what is in store for you unless you stand on the verge of the upstream…!

So have to wait for the two month time, for the results to come in and then decide…meanwhile I have two months of a time…what should I be doing with it.

Obviously, will be going to my native town…where I will join a whole lot of cousins and friends near-by…loads of fun with games and television, movies and talking…will happen.

I have this strange heavy feeling in my heart, I am not able to overcome…what is it? Not sure…I seem to be liking this feeling for a certain episode is running in my mind again…and again and again…like those movies where the heroine sits on a table, or cot, or in the car, or in the bus…just recollects some scene again and again and there it follows a song sequence…

Can I hear music….nah…nah…but something of a melody flows by…!

I can’t forget the way he ran to my vehicle and gave me my rubber back to me…Oh! I had almost forgotten the little thing that I had…it was a spare one I had.

He had causally asked for it…before going to the exam as he had forgotten to bring his…!

I did not know why he took so much of a pain to return it to me…he could have kept it with him…as I had informed him that it was a spare one…he had also said while taking it from me…“I want to talk to you, once you finish the exam wait for me…”

I had asked him what was it, he said…“Wait for me…All the best” and walked off…I stood there gapping at his back as he walked away to his examination room…I recollected myself and walked over to mine…for few minutes, I kept pondering then the exam question papers arrived and the fear of unknown questions took over my brain cells.

When it was just another 30 minutes for the exam to end once again the memory flashed its agony and I wondered what it could be and I was gripped with some unknown bitter sweet sensation that did not let go…I walked out with the satisfaction of having done the best and to my astonishment I found my dad and mom waiting for me just outside the school entrance…I did not know they were coming and I found it really exciting to find them…my little sister was also with them…!

They had come to pick me up and we were off to something nicer after my exams. I was thrilled and forgot all about somebody asking me to wait…and the excitement.

I rushed to meet my other friends with whom I used to always hang out and then started leaving when I heard the final bell go off in the school premises…!

Then like a lighting bolt, it struck me, the words that drained in my ears…“wait for me…”

I turned around and looked for that familiar face, but could not find it in the swarm of school kids who were running out of the exams halls relieved that the dreading exams are over and there is no more of study for at least two months in a row….!

I heard the call of my impatient parents asking me to hurry, and rhyming with the strike of heart and my eyes that was asking to locate that face, that wanted to convey something to me….where is he?

Oh! Now, where did he disappear, I saw him coming out of the exam hall…walking briskly and talking gaily along with his friends…from the smile of his face I could make out it his exam went well….!

By then, I had reached the jeep that was waiting for me to hop in and leave any minute…my dad asked me to jump in…and I looked at him and nodded with my eyes drawn away from his sight and looking at the doorway of the hall and trying to catch those pair of eyes…that beheld my thoughts right now!

Hmm…he was so busy talking to his friends and did not notice me…I found my dad looking at me and at the direction where I was looking, I mumbled…‘I had given my eraser to him in the morning…I want it back…’

He smiled, ‘You can take it when your school re-opens or it is just a rubber, leave it you can buy more…’

I just nodded in agreement and reluctantly hopped into the jeep, my sister had already kept the hind door open…damn, my sister.

I got in and attempted to close the door, the engine started running and the jeep was in motion…I was peeping out to the open enclosure at the hind door and found him walking and running towards my jeep…I screamed…‘Wait, a second…and turned to find my parents, driver and sister looking at me…horrified, I said ‘My rubber…..’

I could hear giggles…and then turned around to find him at the door of the jeep and he said, ‘Here, your rubber, Rani…thanks it was of great help. Happy holidays and see you on the day of results…See ya’

I said, ‘See…ya, well you can keep the rubber will collect it on the day of results…why did you run to return it…? Anyways, now exams are over will not require it much {smile}’

{Smile and I saw a hand wave}

“Yeah, let’s go…we are late…” I heard my dad say.

All I could do is wave my hand and tried asking him by drawing circles and angles in the air and make him understand what was he trying to say to me in the morning and the jeep had moved him out of my sight just like a speck of a dirt on a white shirt….visible enough but can’t do much about it!

I still don’t know what he wanted to say and this thought is getting me restless and I want to days to roll by so that the day of exam results come…and I know my little secret.

What could it be….?

PS: A fictional incomplete thought of an adolescent from its diary!

The Rozabal Line – Review!

I finished this novel last week itself but did not find time to write about it…and to add it all the finish of the novel was a bit too contradictory to the whole novel……..involving Karma and the legendary Hindu Goddess with her three inevitable forms of avatar… delving into one single force of Power and Eternity!

Now, ou might be wondering what is this all about….!! Will unfold!!!

This book seems to be questioning most of the beliefs we have or inculcated into the society from the day one. There is so much in the novel that you are so astonished at the facts and figures and the urge to delve further into the history and realism of them keeps you awake and keeps you reading it…..

I appreciate the way the book is presented to us…it has a different style of writing…it is written according to the dates and the dates of a calender is what keeps you moving about…you travel between eras and you find the hidden truths of things that are not visible at first…!

The novel starts off with the quest for the lineage of Christ…and it travels to India and the ‘Heaven on Earth – Kashmir’ is the place where we come to know that Christ breathed his last and then on we go through a roller coaster ride to know the origins of Mary Magdalene, King Ashoka, King Siddarath (Gautam Budda), the incarnation of Krishna, and many others….!

The book deals with varied facts and history and the various beliefs that man have carried down since the birth of Christ…it also deals with the terrorism that questions the humanness and the horrid fact about killing human mercilessly and the politics that is involved in the making of terrorism groups – you name it, it is described here…!

This book does not appear as a fable sometimes in-spite of it being one…!! It has the wonderful art of story telling binding each act and action into one of the best story that can be foretold with history as a fact…!

The use of the several biggest beliefs of human and shaking them to the core with your work is one side but the fabricated linkage between each episode and the occurrences makes you wonder if all this which is unfolding before your eyes…Can this be true…?!

You feel you could do a research on those facts and prove them as fable or truth and then go on seeing the world in different angles..!

Well, if listening is not enough…seeing is a kind of proof that we hold truth! But, what we have read makes us think that the possibility of Karma to a larger extend.

Maybe we are Indians and we believe in the ‘Karma Effect’ even with or without our own conscious convincing us….! This novel makes a great deal to the thinking mind…!

Believe if you want to take a dip into the varied facts and beliefs that are before us…take a plunge into the novel that can make you rock..!!

But somehow I did not like the way the novel ended…it could have been something different with all those journey between past and future…I was expecting another end to it…but after all it is a novel…What else can you expect that is more befitting!!!

Read it once………to know what I am saying! It is worth a read…!

Inglourious Basterds – An Aftermath!

Hmmm….! I never watch movies just like that and I don’t intend to watch every other movie…I rarely watch movies and when someone recommends it…I dare do it just for avoiding the repeated questioning !

So far haven’t felt bad after watching a recommendation….and here is one such movie…!

This movie is another war movie on the same subject of Nazi, the rivalry between the Jews, French and Germans and the unholy World War II.

To start off and after reading about the movie synopsis from Wikipedia and the other Websites, I was just wondering it must be treated the same way any other movie of the same genres….!

Naah, I was in surprise…how many ever films or movies are made of this subject I feel there is some amount of heroism during that period that cannot be countable or described in any form of medium….

This movie coming from a Famous Director – Quentin Tarantino and movies such as, Reservoir Dogs (1992), Pulp Fiction (1994) and Kill Bill (Vol I – 2003,Vol II – 2004) in his bucket will I not watch this masterpiece too….!

The story unfolds in a novel way….there are four chapters and each chapter has a story to say and the final chapter ends the movie linking all the characters of each chapter.

It is certainly about two plots that are behind the killing of Nazi’s or Germans..!!

The cast of the movie includes Brad Pit, Christoph Waltz, Michael Fassbender, Eli Roth, Diane Krüger and Mélanie Laurent and many others…but these are noted for their performances.

Christoph Waltz received the Best Actor award from the Cannes Film Festival his acting is so good that you can actually see him living through the character….He is nick named as ‘The Jew Hunter’ in the film and he seems to be one…you just wonder how does he sense it and there he has already done it…!

I personally do not like Brad Pit…but I was moved by his performance as well…!

Watch it…a through war movie that talks about the war heroes in their right sense…!

Mom & Me!

Inspired by a conversation between me and my mother…!

As a toddler

She is a pretty little thing

That walks and talks with her

The plaything that makes her wonder?!

As a grown-up

She is the smart girl in the locale

That keeps her always on toes

The flower bud, that makes her bewilder?!

As a teenager

She is the Queen Rival – outright

The praises and looks that she deserves

Are here’s now, without hereto?!

As a Woman

She is the perfect bride

For a man’s nest that can render

The counterfoil for an aging soul?!

As a mother

She is the toughest kind

For the roles now reversed

All she needs is your care?!

You and I are the shades of us

In a hidden bean, which

Gives away aroma, when roasted

In a perfect blend for life…!

It’s been a Year – Today’s Anniversary!

It’s been a year already and there is so much of memories that we still speak of and refer to some things and practices that we were used to being part of this corporal of business activity – and that is spoke and referred to is only half of what we have experienced here!!

Hmmm…..Nobody thought last year would be of so much problem for the employees of Satyam Computer Services !!!

There was uncertainty, losses, cries, misbeliefs, hatred, uncertainty, cries of foul, cries of worry and what not …You name a ‘Negative Emotion’ and there you could use it to describe the situation…!

Amidst all these there were people who wanted to stay and fight back, some moved on, some stood to see and watch what can be done…in all these episodes – there is one universal truth that showed was – the ‘Love for the Company’!

This was the day last year, when an employee who returned to work on the same friendly campus became hostile….!

There was mails flying up and down and people enquiring about your next course of events and it was a big chaos out there in the morning of Business Hour…Even the chaos in the ‘Sensex Market’ would have been just like the cry in the ‘Fish Market’ but the ‘Offices of Satyam Computers’ – out surged as Winner… amongst them!

There was one question in most of the employees who had their share of Golden Life in the company – “Why, did the Chairman had to do thus? – What could have been the reason?”

And a thousand suggestions to substantiate that one man’s decision….!

It was a day of most unexpected and unpredicted outcomes…most unforgettable day in the history of an Working Middle Class Human Being …..!

This day did not only tell us all the truth of life that – Nothing is certain in life, but also taught us to make our lives simple and uncomplicated…!

I am not sure about others but for me – it certainly did and that is one day I knew…Whatever plans you make with the things on your hand, isn’t there in your hand at all.

I started my tenure with this company exactly 34 months back and was about to complete my third anniversary with this company, coming March…but I was devastated with the news and was wondering what more is in store…!

I had moved on from there, but still remember this company with the same vigor and likeness…this place was like home and would have stayed with it…for the uncertainty that it unfolded.

I walked on…with life not to see what I could gather more…but I walked on without hope and faith, that I held so many days…!

I walked further on to turn back and see that – the place dear to me like so many others along with does not remain today!!

I could not stand and watch the faith – die a slow death that wasn’t there with me anymore….!

I am here today, but will never forget that I was there too…!

The company has regained the faith it lost and has worked on with blasphemy…Wish, someday I see the name and I can say – I was part of that, someday…before I walked on faithless!!

I salute to the name that stood high as long as it did last!!

Image Courtesy : An old file image from Google